Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
She bit a glass in half.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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