when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
