:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
