He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
