loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
40s are totally the cure
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
