he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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