So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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