im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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