If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Randomize
