My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
