no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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