I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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