What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize