Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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