Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
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