You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
