3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Randomize
