I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Randomize
