Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
