Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I would fuck him just for his dog
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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