Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
