Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Randomize
