just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
