I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
