Define "chronic" masturbator.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
