it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
