Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
