Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
