Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
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