So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
