Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
