How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
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