Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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