no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
