Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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