i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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