But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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