can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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