Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
