its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
the gays at disneyland are vicious
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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