Are we in a gay sports bar?
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Randomize
