Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
