Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
