I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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