I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
