Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
