ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Don't tell me you're on acid again
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
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