She announced her abortion via fbk
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Randomize
