# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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