ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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