Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I've blown a few things in my day
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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