Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
