Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
We just shotgunned beers for America
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
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